Beauty

It didn’t start out like this, I only saw you from a distance. We had similar interests it just started with a picture together and a phone number. How did it end up so far? We were only friends staying in contact over little things that we had shared. When did it change? It feels like it was over night when I thought what if there was something more, we were just friends. You were just a girl, a beautiful girl but we were just friends. Gorgeous golden hair, stunning body but it didn’t matter we only shared a few days as friends. I could see the stars in your eyes the kindness in your smile the love in your heart and just like that it was something else. What was this feeling? I’ve never had it before but I thought we were just friends. I came to see you, it was just a movie why didn’t I want to leave when it was over? We were just staying in contact but why did it feel like it was different? You felt the same way I thought when did it happen, we barely know each other we gave it a shot, I haven’t been happier it was what I wanted but I never thought it would happen. We tried our best but then you were gone what did I do, should have I acted differently? It was the first time I’ve felt like this I didn’t know what I was doing, I thought it could work but I was wrong and now we were nothing at all. With time I healed but I still felt the same. We weren’t even friends when did this happen I thought I knew you but I guess I was wrong. Life went on and we were nothing but a day passed and I thought of you I wanted to know how you were doing I missed my friend. I just wanted to know if you were ok, we started to be friends again this is what I need, we were friends just like before. Talking of interests what we wanted with our lives. We were friends we shared our emotions I saw your smile again it warmed my heart but I was scared to start to feel. I didn’t wat it to end like it did again, I just wanted a friend. It was just a movie it was just a glance it was only a smile a hug goodbye, I had the feeling what was it? I felt it before why now? We are only friends I just wanted to make sure you were doing well. Why this, why now, why again? I could only think what happened last time, I didn’t want this. It couldn’t be, why, why, why did my hear decide I wanted this? I dint tell you I didn’t want to change what we were; only friends. We share our feeling we shared what we’ve been through and it happened again. We gave it another try we were going good, when did it change? What did I do? Was it the distance? Was it me? What was wrong? Just like before you were gone I had a hole in the same place as before, I lost my friend. I may have found out what love was then but it only hurt me. I tried to replace you with someone close, it didn’t work. It wasn’t the same, she wasn’t you. I missed you I needed you, why did you push me away? I thought we could work I guess I was wrong again and now time goes on I start to heal but not like before there was still something missing. It was you this time that started it as a friend, you shared a picture from years before, it was the fires picture we had together and just like before we were talking again. This time it was different I was wary about my feeling I tried to close myself off but in turn did the opposite to you. We opened up more learned things we’ve never said our loud and this time it was different, it was compassion that I felt. It was love that you gave and it was what I needed at the time. I was going through hell all alone but you were there an angle of light to guide my way. You healed a part of me that wasn’t getting fixed, you gave me your heart and I did the same. We helped each other this time I knew I was sure that this was love I felt and just like that we gave it a chance. We were stronger this time we shared music, we shared a dance, we shared a kiss and I wanted more. I wanted to love you forever, I gave you a part of me. I was whole again, I gave you a charm it was all I had left of a life before. It was a promise to be forever. It was something you accepted whole heartedly, it was what we wanted I was happy for the first time in a long time. It was lovely it was something new it was what I needed but you left. It hurt more than you know, you may have said you wanted me to stay but I know I couldn’t do that and continue on. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, I had support form a new friend but he wasn’t you he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how to help but he tried and I thanked him for what he did. I still loved you I told you this but hope was the biggest it ever was. Why did you leave, why didn’t you say something to me? I could have changed but I should have known after the first two tries, I shouldn’t have let it happen but you know third times the charm but people don’t change do they? Why did I try, why was I weak? We will never know but just know I always loved you no matter what happened, I still do. I know you have a life and family of your own but I still know you were my first love. You showed me what love was and I don’t think I would change that. You helped me be who I am today even if you aren’t here now, you helped get me through the tough time I had. You helped me change for the better. You helped me achieve something I didn’t think would happen. You are still the angle that showed me light, you guided me through the tunnel. I still love you, it’s been four years since we talked but know I still think of you often. I still know I love you in some way but I’ve grown, I’ve moved on. I still thank you for what you did. It was six years ago when we met and I wouldn’t have changed a thing, you were what I needed at the time you showed me another life, you helped me get through hell. I’ll always love you in some way, you touched my heart and I hope I did the same. I hope you’re doing well, we may never meet again but if we do I hope we can share stories we gained throughout the years. Goodbye yesterday, hello tomorrow, I’m here for you ill beat it with hear and make my own path.